Not to make excuses, but I'm convinced there's some conspiracy that keeps me from having sex ... Could the problem be all inside my head? Well, maybe ...t just takes the right woman...I met her one warm summer Saturday morning at the college sailing club. I was skippering one of eight boats giving introductory sailboat rides to prospective members. The boat was a Penguin, an 11 foot cat rigged hard chine dingy; or a small tippy sailboat with one sail to you landlubbers. Sail boats are expensive. We then got out of the tub, error each other off, and went back to her room and fell asleep.The next morning I woke up, and I could hear something in the kitchen. I put my underwear on and walk there, and Lauren is there washing a couple dishes and getting some juice from the fridge...Completely naked. "Good morning", I say to her. "Good morning Josh, oh wait a second". She walks over to me and pulls down my underwear. "I'm making a no clothes policy when your here, effective immediately!" I. Whatever! I have a diaper and askirt and a pink tank-top. These pig-tails... whatever. I have to move. Ihave to change. I have to get Owens out of here.I pull myself to my feet and stagger away from the arch separating thekitchen and the hallway. I'm in the dining room as they enter thekitchen."Katie!" Owens calls out. "Now where did she get to?" he muses loudly."Katie!" Jenny joins in."This is weird," Stewart chimes in. "You know about Katie?" he asksOwens."You ought not let a baby wander. One part of me was pissed that I had avoided getting invited to the party and a second shot at Lizzy. The other part was relieved I wouldn't have to either come up with some lame excuse not to go. In the end I rubbed one out while picturing Lizzy and Renee doing body shots.On Monday evening I went to the grocery store after work. I am always on the lookout for girls I might have spurned during my wild days. As I was moving about the aisles perusing the wares, I saw Lizzy pass the other end of.
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I never had a problem getting a date, having a girlfriend, but it seemed that I couldn’t keep a relationship. I often preferred hanging with friends
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